>First Intern Moment

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It finally happened. I had been expecting it for awhile now. After two weeks, it was bound to happen. It was inevitable, right? Of course it was! How did I not see it coming?! I mean, it is the fate of every lowly intern that has ever been a lowly intern. That’s right: today I finally had my intern moment.

It all went down when I was asked to vacuum the downstairs basement. I wasn’t surprised or put back by the task; it was just that I had been waiting for it for over two weeks.

Weird analogy time!

You know when after you do something a little mean to your friend and to get back at you they say, “I am going to hit in the balls someday. But I am not going to tell you when I am going do it.” And then when they do it, it shocks you, but you soon realize it wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. And besides, you kind of deserve it after you got him in trouble for keeping him out past his curfew because you were so messed up and he was worried about your well being. (Not like that has ever happened, mom)

Well that is what this morning was like when I was asked to clean up the basement. I deserved it because I am an intern, and well, that is just what happens to interns. Exactly like what ensues when a friend gets hit in the balls after he gets his other friend in trouble- he deserves it and that is just what happens. (Now do you kind of see how that weird analogy works? And yes I just realized I compared my senior project/internship to being kicked in the balls, but I want you to know it is anything but that. In fact it is the complete opposite of being kicked in the balls – whatever that is; you can figure it out on your own because I am trying to keep this blog PG being as I am turning this into my school. But honestly this internship has been awesome)

Now then -getting back to the story after that really long irrelevant tangent that probably only made sense to me- when I was asked to clean up the basement my reaction was this:

What the heck took you guys so long! I am your intern, you guys basically own me! Ask me to get you coffee and do it. Ask me to get you lunch and I do it. I am an intern and I am the lowest on the totem pole.

Anyway, as I walked down the green paint peeling crooked stairs to a dark disgusting basement with so many cobwebs that it would have worked perfectly as the set for a campy horror movie; I was given a purple vacuum. As I began to vacuum I soon noticed that it was barley picking anything up. So I thought maybe turning it on and off would fix it, but of course it didn’t. I then figured emptying the filter bag might fix it, but nope, of course it didn’t. So I ended up using this purple vacuum that performed as poorly as that purple football team from Minnesota does in the super bowl.

After going over the carpet five times and barley picking anything up, I had enough. I went up stairs and said I did as much as I could and we need a better vacuum. Of course right then and there I am presented with a vacuum that works. So I go back down and finish up. Sorry for the abrupt ending, but the narrative was starting to bore me as much as it was probably starting to bore you.

Nonetheless, after waiting a whole two weeks for it to happen, it was a nice experience finally getting my first intern moment.

Anyway now onto some sports bullet point, which if you haven’t realized by now is me basically just talking about the NBA.

• Congratulation to Chris Bosh, you finally learned how to play like a good offensive power forward. Boy oh boy did he go off against the Bulls last night. The Bulls play good defense but horrible offense. I never thought I would ever say this about an NBA team: But the Bulls might not win the series because they are incapable of playing team offense. I hope the Bulls get it together, but if they don’t the series is going to go to the heat.

• Remember when I said I thought Russell Westbrook reminds me of a more athletic Stephon Marburry minus the ego? Well scratch that. While he doesn’t have an ego like Starburry he has the same stubborn idiosyncrasies as Marburry. While it is good to be hard headed and believe in yourself, I feel like Westbrook’s stubbornness will be his downfall and will be the foible that derails him from ever reaching his full potential. (He might get you 30 points but he will also commit 7 turnovers. which turns into, somewhere between 14-21 points for the other team, so he is really only scoring between 9-16 points for you, and because he doesn’t get a lot of assist he isn’t contributing anymore points for the Thunder. And when Thunder’s half court offense basically revolves around isolations for Westbrook and Durant, they will loose this series. On a side note let me explain in my opinion what the role of point guard on offense is now: The role of the point guard is to create as many points as possible, be that through scoring or passing. At the same time it is the point guard’s duty to make as many possessions count as possible all the while taking care of the ball and limiting careless possessions and limiting turnovers. On another side note, if a point guard doesn’t have any turnovers in a game it means two things: 1. He played an absolute perfect game -highly unlikely – or 2. Wasn’t aggressive in creating scoring opportunities for his team. Personally if my PG doesn’t have between 1-3 turnovers in a game that tells me he is playing timid. And the one thing you can say about Westbrook is he does anything but play timid. That being said if a point guard has anymore than four turnovers in a game, that is just playing reckless.)

I don’t know what to say about the Twins other than: PLAY BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously, Ticket King has taken a hit because you guys are stinking up the joint.

Anyway until next time…

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